WHAT A F%$£*#G DISGRACE
Tonight my girlfriend and I went to ikea to buy a super king size bed. We'd had our eye on a particular number for a few months now. We wanted low rise 'cos we had a whole Japanese theme idea for the bedroom. Well...
Within ikea we paid for the bed and mattress (extra firm) and asked for delivery. The lady ( I say lady... I really mean 17 year old crack whore) on the counter told us that we would have to hand pick the headboard, slats, and mattress (super king) and then go to a collection depo for the bed itself. We were also told that in order to get delivery we would have to pay first, then leave the building and then go to a delivery request desk before actually arranging the said delivery. Well we did this... and guess... what a total fuck up! Once we had paid for the bed frame, mattress, head board, and all manner of other plasticized shit, we were told that they could only deliver on Tuesday. "Oh", I said. Do you not deliver weekends? "No, we only deliver within 48 (fucking) hours of order" - so, let me get this straight. Just because I have wasted my whole Saturday evening in Ikea I now have to have a day off work in order to receive a bed from you? "Yes" - bollocks. They had completely conned us as we had already paid for the items. Twats.
So as a result, my girlfriend and I decided to attempt to bring the whole bed mattress combo back to the house ourselves. For background information I would like to say that I own a black, 16 valve, VW Polo and my girlfriend drives an even more midgetised vehicle, a Yaris. So the whole idea of getting a super king size mattress into the vehicle was maybe a bit adventurous.
Well, we spent 15 minutes in the depot car park trying to decide which car would be best to carry the 6ft long mattress & bed kit. After trying the Yaris first, we decided to try my Polo - only to smash the fucking window in the process. Yes! I managed to completely crack the windscreen using a bed frame 10% longer than the length of my car. Wankers.
So all in all the trip to ikea lasted a total of three hours - including three journeys there and back. Yes and we only live 10 minutes from it. So, the lessons to be learnt from this sordid tale are thus...
1. Don't waste your Saturday evening by thinking that you can get to Ikea and back in half an hour and be back for the football.
2. Make sure that you know exactly how the delivery system works before purchasing anything, ever.
3. Don't own a midget car
4. If you ever need a crack whore - then go to idea - they come in flat pack.
Goodnight (vexed)
15 Comments:
Sorry about your shitty and costly evening. I thought the Swedish had everything figured out!
I take it you were at the same Ikea I frequent in Warrington - ever got in the kiddie ball pool?
I spent four days in a prison cell 'cos of that ball pool. I have a child like fantasy of filling my house with the balls that they have in those places. Imagine how cool that would be!
I say lady... I really mean 17 year old crack whore
Good one! I think I know this lady. She works at our neighborhood McDonald's, too. Sorry for the sucky status of your Saturday, although I think I need to know more now about your stint in the big house.
No offence meant but untill now I thought that you were gay. Opps! Sorry that the store gave you such a hard time.
G.A.Y.? Is that the kind of comment you leave on all blogs you visit Rose?
I'll have you know that I am fiend of the night... the closest to being gay I've been involved a wet dream about a couple of lesbians.
I'll save that one for another entry (no pun either)
UGH!! Was recently dragged about Ikea by a friend who just HAD to buy a garden furniture set from there.
Fecking. Night. Mare.
I don't envy you the experience, nor missing the football game - another experience I have only recently been introduced to and am loving VERY much!
Football = good.
Ikea = bad. very bad.
I'm ashamed to be Swedish... I always thought we were really effecient when it came to these things. Hrm, well, my bad... On behalf of Ikea's country of origin, I do appologize!
This is definitely not the first IKEA horror story I've heard
sorry for your crappy experience... did you end up getting the bed home?
and more importantly, did you get it set up? (I don't know if it's just because i'm retarded, but I'm incapable of putting ANYTHING together. even with directions.)
No offence meant but untill now I thought that you were gay.
Ha ha ha ha ha! That reminded me of Friends when everyone thinks Chandler is gay!
I do not wear cardigans / sweater vests (just for the record)
I think this may be a disease that spreads from furniture store to furniture store. It may have originated at Ikea, but it must have spread to Super Amart at some point. Last time I bought a bed from them there was a similar cock up and some parts of my bed (unimportant parts like the mattress, posts etc) didn't turn up for four weeks.
I also had to take 3 days off work waiting for them at my home (because they kept failing to turn up!).
I feel your pain my friend.
This is why I think Ikea is pure evil and is trying to take over the world
I've never been to an Ikea. So i take it, it's not a good place to go then!
No Ikea is okay. You can get some pretty good quality furniture etc. It's just that the staff there look like they've just been dragged off the street.
Pack of shunts.
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